Tuesday Tome - The Seven Big Myths about Marriage

In preparation for our upcoming Valley Married Couples Retreat and spring/summer premarital counseling, I've decided to do a little personal refresher study. I'm reading The Seven Big Myths about Marriage: What Science, Faith, and Philosophy Teach Us about Love and Happiness by Christopher and Jennifer Kaczor.  While the book is written from a Catholic perspective, I think much of the content will serve a much broader Christian perspective. We'll see.

At the very least, I think the book will be thought-provoking. Peter Kreeft, whose books I've enjoyed through the years, had this to say about 7 Myths: "Reading this book is good exercise for your head... If I were a pastor, I would make this book required reading for engaged couples in all my marriage classes."

Table of Contents...
Introduction: Happiness and Identity
1. The First Big Myth: "Love is Simple"
2. The Second Big Myth: "Marriage is a Fifty-Fifty Contract"
3. The Third Big Myth: "Love Alone Makes a Marriage"
4. The Fourth Big Myth: "Cohabitation is Just Like Marriage"
5. The Fifth Big Myth: "Premarital Sex Is No Big Deal"
6. The Sixth Big Myth: "Children Are Irrelevant to Marriage"
7. The Seventh Big Myth: "All Reproductive Choices Are Equal"

The Publisher's Description...

This work explores some of the most interesting and vexing problems in contemporary life. Appealing to reason rather than religious authority, the book tackles the most controversial and talked about positions of the Catholic Church - on contraception, on marriage, on reproductive technologies, on cohabitation, and on divorce - arguing for the reasonableness of the Church's views on these issues.

The book's interdisciplinary approach, following the precedent of Thomas Aquinas, looks to human happiness and fulfillment, properly understood, in seeking the answers to questions about how to live. It aims to show to skeptical readers that what the Catholic Church teaches about controversial issues is rationally justified by considering evidence from psychology, sociology, and philosophy.

The foundation of Kaczor s approach is happiness. We all want to be happy. Every day, in whatever we do, we seek this goal. But what exactly is happiness? And how can we find it? The saints and psychologists agree: there can be no real happiness without authentic love-erotic love, friendship love, and self-giving love (agape).

From this foundation of happiness Kaczor explores the nature of marriage, and the love they promise to each other, which is agape, a self­giving love that is the choice to do good for the other. He also examines alternatives to covenant marriage, such as polygamy and same­sex marriage, as well as cohabitation.

Finally the book explores the value of children. To make sense of Catholic teaching on contraception, he says that we must first reconsider the value of fertility and having children. Only in this perspective, can one begin to understanding what the Church teaches.